Stopped In Our Tracks
            Occasionally, my severely autistic son stops suddenly in his tracks. Sometimes he appears to be in distress. Sometimes he’s just frozen in place.
            A neurological blip hitting a temporary off switch? A tangible memory he’s struggling to process? Stomach cramps?
            We don’t know. He has enough language to request a favorite food or person. He can yell words when he wants help spelling something for a YouTube search.
            But he can’t tell us why he abruptly freezes.
            Every life has frozen-in-the-tracks moments. An unexpected illness. Loss of a friendship, or a job, or one’s sense of self. Death of a loved one.
            My son snaps out of his frozen states eventually.
            The time-space continuum shifts into forward gear and his feet move on the trail again.
            Same for the rest of us. Despite life’s explosions that shock us into a stop-motion state, we get up and move again.
            One of our “stop-in-our-tracks” moments was when our son’s beloved “autism whisperer” passed away suddenly (see In Memory and Thanks). 
            We’re still here. We’re still walking.
            Keep putting one foot forward.
            This week’s Hike Notes, Phyllis Ellman Trail to Ring Mountain, leads up a hilly, rocky path to Ring Mountain in Tiburon. (For an outing directly to the Ring Mountain rock formation areas, see previous post, Ring Mountain-Tiburon.) 
            Please feel free to share. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photos!
            The list of hikes is getting long! Please check the Quick View Hike List or scroll down the main Hikes page to see the current list of hike notes.
New this week:
Hike Notes 63: Phyllis Ellman Trail to Ring Mountain

A Helping Hand
            Some of us have a hard time reaching out for help, accepting help, acknowledging we need any help. The words “stubbornly independent” come to mind.
            For a person like my severely autistic son, there would be no life without constant support. We offer him help gladly, and he reaches his hand back in acceptance (most of the time).
            As a constantly worrying mom, I am grateful for others who help our son. And for people who support the rest of our family. And for those who push past my stubbornness to lift me up, knowing how moms can get bogged down in worry and never-ending challenges for our special needs family members.
            On this Mother’s Day weekend, I express gratitude to the people in the world who offer a helping hand to others. To those of us whose comfort zone is to offer help but not receive it: Remember to graciously accept offers of kindness and support. Helping hands travel on a two-way street.
            This week’s Hike Notes, Pacifica Pier from Mori Point, takes hikers on a 3-mile round trip walk along Old Mori Trail to the Coastal Trail in Pacifica. (For a more rugged hill hike in this area, see previous post, Mori Point.) 
            Please feel free to share. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photos!
            The list of hikes is getting long! Please check the Quick View Hike List or scroll down the main Hikes page to see the current list of hike notes.
New this week:
Hike Notes 62: Pacifica Pier from Mori Point

Tree Tunnel Passages
            Many years ago, my husband’s family sent a Japanese language copy of popular animated movie “My Neighbor Totoro” from Japan. My sons (and we parents) watched it countless times.
            One young girl character has a penchant for stumbling into enticing, mysterious tree tunnels.
            “Look, a Totoro tree tunnel!” I call out to my hiking companions whenever we approach a canopied pathway.
            Tunnels have a magnetic attractive force. Visually, they draw our eyes. Physically, they pull us forward. Emotionally, they hit certain switches.
            When a tree tunnel comes into view, I stop and absorb for a moment before plunging ahead.
            A tunnel is a portal from one place to another, both in terms of tangible space and harder to define elements.
            I, too, enjoy venturing ahead into a tree tunnel, seeing where it twists and turns, sensing how it opens up to wide space again. Looking back to ponder the road we’ve walked has its benefits. Sometimes, though, I just enjoy the tunnel as I’m passing through, and let it flow behind me, feet aiming forward to the trail ahead.
            This week’s Hike Notes, Glen Canyon Park from Below, lead along the lower level paths of a favorite nature-in-the-city site, Glen Canyon Park in San Francisco. (See previous entry for the upper trails: Glen Canyon Park from Above.) 
            Please feel free to share. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photos!
            The list of hikes is getting long! Please check the Quick View Hike List or scroll down the main Hikes page to see the current list of hike notes.
New this week:
Hike Notes 61: Glen Canyon Park from Below

Friendly Ghosts
            A leaf scuffling quirkily ahead on your path.
            A bird commenting insistently toward you. 
            A curtain blowing in a peculiar, persistent way.
            A light tap on the shoulder when no one is there.
            A thickness in the air. Not a smell, not a sound—an indefinable feeling of a presence.
            Like the nostalgic feeling that whooshes in with the smell of pumpkin pie (or whatever your favorite childhood food was), memories of lost loved ones can be triggered by an image, a sound or a fragrance. 
            The occasional, unexpected “visit” of memories and a sense of treasured people (or pets) we’ve lost can be a welcome surprise.
            Places we visited with our son’s “autism whisperer,” who we lost years ago (In Memory and Thanks), sometimes bring a tangible sense of his essence.
            Memories of loved ones, no matter how long ago they left this earth, are treasures to be embraced. If there is such a thing as ghosts, these are the friendly ones.
            This week’s Hike Notes introduce a walk on the inner loop and hill at Stow Lake: Strawberry Hill and Stow Lake Pagoda. Search online for various versions of Stow Lake and Strawberry Hill’s own ghost story of the “White Lady,” a story first mentioned in print in the San Francisco Chronicle in 1908. A stroll around this classic San Francisco treasure is best enjoyed in daylight hours!
            Please feel free to share. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photos!
            The list of hikes is getting long! Please check the Quick View Hike List or scroll down the main Hikes page to see the current list of hike notes.
New this week:
Hike Notes 60: Strawberry Hill and Stow Lake Pagoda

The Accidental Steep Trail
            “Want to go to Hidden Lake?” my son’s autism helper/hiking buddy tossed out cavalierly one chilly afternoon. Badass destination names like “Pirates Cove” and “Hidden Lake” make my heart flutter. A wish-list destination hadn’t been on my radar that day, but why not?
            “If you think we’ll have enough daylight, sounds great,” I said. A midafternoon start meant a race to beat the January sunset.
            Lake Lagunitas shimmered with a grayish-green winter pallor. After a short jaunt along the lake, we turned up a trail featuring wooden footbridges and a stretch of redwood trees.
            “Wrong trail for Hidden Lake, sorry,” said the hiking buddy, checking a trail map. Daylight hourglass running, we persisted with our accidental trail.
            Rocks and fallen tree debris indicated infrequent use. 
            We climbed. Twisted rocky turns moved us upward but not far forward.
            “Maybe this is a good break spot,” our hiking buddy said. My son was dragging after all the steep climbing, and light was fading.
            “The trail junction only looks like another quarter mile or so,” I said wistfully.
            “Go ahead, I have him here.”
            I’m pretty fit for strength, but not for cardio. The encroaching dark had me running, but the trail junction was elusive.
            I’ve only felt spooked on a trail a handful of times. Something about the dirt path and scattered leaves reminded me of a short story about a couple who were entranced by birds in an isolated forest, only to vanish.
            I finally reached a faded, vague jumble of crossing paths. I hadn’t made it to the crest I sensed by the light through the trees, but at least I’d hit some sort of junction point.
            I jog-walked down the trail to find the rocky snack break spot empty. They must have started back down. My heart raced as I pushed to catch up.
            “Not doing that one again,” our hiking buddy said as we descended back to the lake.
            “Those steep stretches were a son of a gun,” I agreed, “but it was good.”
            Any trail is worth walking once. Even if it’s steep. Even if it’s dark. Even if it’s hard.
            We don’t always have a choice. Keep putting one foot forward.
            This week’s Hike Notes lead along the Colier Spring Trail from Lake Lagunitas (just “Colier Trail” on some maps), a steep, sometimes rugged trail with some old growth redwoods that makes for a great cardio workout, even if you don’t go all the way to the top.
            Please feel free to share. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photos!
            The list of hikes is getting long! Please check the Quick View Hike List or scroll down the main Hikes page to see the current list of hike notes.
New this week:
Hike Notes 59: Colier Spring Trail from Lake Lagunitas

Embracing the Good Things
            Everyone faces challenges, which for our family includes severe neurodevelopmental issues for our younger son.
            Eating, sleeping, communicating, bathing, toilet, behavioral issues, sensory processing troubles. We face difficulties on all of these fronts. Yet the level of struggle we see other families face makes our lives look easy.
            So on the rare easier day or carefree moment, I almost feel guilty. Like I’m not allowed to enjoy those happier times because it’s unfair to others who are struggling.
            Or maybe it’s because being in a PTSD minefield 24/7 makes letting your guard down even for a minute feel risky.
            But life is here to enjoy when we can. So I will say that I am grateful to live in a place where there is beautiful nature at every turn, even within the city itself. I am grateful to have good people who make life a little easier and a lot more fun. I am grateful to be here.
            May we all find it in ourselves to drop our guard, let go of what holds us back from enjoying life, and embrace the good things around us.
            This week’s Hike Notes introduce a walk from Fort Mason Stairs to Hyde Street Pier, one of many stairway walks in San Francisco that offer a cardio workout along with spectacular views.
            Please feel free to share. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photos!
            The list of hikes is getting long! Please check the Quick View Hike List or scroll down the main Hikes page to see the current list of hike notes.
New this week:
Hike Notes 58: Fort Mason Stairs to Hyde Street Pier

A Moment Alone
            Though challenging, we’ve managed a few cabin overnights with my severely autistic son. When not busy with camp chores, we explore nearby trails.
            I rarely get to hike on my own. On one cabin-stay hike, my son, husband and hiking buddy/helper lagged behind. 
            I looked back to see if they were catching up. They weren’t. The peak we’d eyed on the trail map was ahead of me and I wasn’t giving up.
            I tried texting. Cell connections went in and out.
            They knew I’d go to the peak, come hell or high water, and I knew my son was in safe hands.
            I eagerly chugged uphill so as not to strand them for long. At every turn of the trail, I realized the peak was farther away than it looked five minutes earlier. There was not a soul other than our crew on almost two miles of trail.
            A wooded tree tunnel offered a shady break from the sunny open fire road. There was an eerie silence as I approached the dark woodsy path. Evidence of a predator’s meal, bits of fluffy fur clinging to bones, stuck out from some leaves.
            Feeling spooked, I forced myself to plunge through the dark patch. I had to push through one last uphill grind to get to the top.
            The peak was isolated and stunning. 
            I took a rare breath alone, looking out at the world from above 1400 feet. The moving patterns formed by sun and breezy shadows were mesmerizing. 
            That short time away from life’s cares was a treasure money can’t buy. For some of us, even a few minutes of respite time is hard to come by. All of us should give ourselves the gift of stopping our world from turning, if only for a moment.
            This week’s Hike Notes introduce a hike to Barnabe Peak from Madrone Camp in Samuel P. Taylor State Park. 
            Please feel free to share. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photos!
            The list of hikes is getting long! Please check the Quick View Hike List or scroll down the main Hikes page to see the current list of hike notes.
New this week:
Hike Notes 57: Barnabe Peak from Madrone Camp

Quieting the Mind
            Blossoms fluttering in the breeze. Cloud-speckled sky reflected in a pond. A split path beckoning in two directions.
            Focusing on those simple things can clear away the clattering clutter in our heads.
            During my years living in Japan, finding a quiet moment to still the mind became a genuine necessity. City life meant crowded trains, crowded streets, hustle and bustle on every front: work, shopping, even leisure time. Stress—from outside, and from within.
            Quiet places to escape the stressful cacophony are more easily found outdoors, but I learned in Japan to find my Zen moments anywhere. A small, second story window in a rattletrap apartment, too high to see out, provided the sound of a nearby bamboo tree swaying in the breeze. I still miss gazing up at the moving shadow of that bamboo tree, and the calming moments it offered.
            But still, given the choice, I go outdoors to find mind-stilling spaces. The calming force of nature is also one of the best medicines I offer my special needs son. 
            Not every outing has to be a long hike. Finding a place to stop and contemplate falling flower petals can be just as reenergizing.
            This week’s Hike Notes introduce a Japanese Tea Garden Stroll, an easy walk through the garden paths of the Japanese Tea Garden in San Francisco’s Golden Gate Park.
            Please feel free to share. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photos!
            The list of hikes is getting long! Please check the Quick View Hike List or scroll down the main Hikes page to see the current list of hike notes.
New this week:
Hike Notes 56: Japanese Tea Garden Stroll

Fumbling Through the Fog
            Pummeling sensory overload and other neurological challenges had my autism spectrum son struggling in a deep fog for years. He could barely navigate the world (Home).
            Phases of struggling through a blind haze can happen in anyone’s life, for all sorts of reasons.
            Caregivers of extraordinarily challenged loved ones sometimes fumble through amorphous mystery zones. There is no universal guidebook on how to offer the best help, because everyone is unique.
            How can I provide a happy life for my son as he gets older? I reach through misty vapors of the unknown looking for answers.
            Sometimes I set life’s stresses aside, and walk literally through the fog with my son. Mountain trails of Marin, the surf line along a San Francisco beach—we have no shortage of misty locales.
            My mental haze when fretting about life versus my sense of clarity when out on a trail—even on the foggiest day—stand in illustrative contrast. I sense the same in my son.
            This week’s Hike Notes lead up to Hill 88 from Rodeo Beach, a head-clearing hike whether in a mist that limits visibility to ten feet or clear skies that open the view to landmarks fifty miles away.
            Please feel free to share. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photos!
            The list of hikes is getting long! Please check the Quick View Hike List or scroll down the main Hikes page to see the current list of hike notes.
New this week:
Hike Notes 55: Hill 88 from Rodeo Beach

Favorite, Secret Places
            In a year of posting hikes on HikingAutism.com, I have yet to post any of my top favorites. Most of us have people, places, and things so special to us that we’re not inclined to share them.
            In the early stretch of our special needs son’s breaking free from his housebound state and getting outdoors (Home, In Memory and Thanks), California was suffering from on-and-off drought conditions. Finding an actively running waterfall felt like searching for a rare bird.
            In winter when we’d get some rain, I’d think, “Now is the chance to hike to a waterfall!”
            The Bill Williams Trail in Marin County stood out on a list of waterfall hikes. My son, his hiking guide buddy and I headed up the trail, thinking the first small falls we saw in the forest was “the waterfall,” but turns out the bigger falls are deeper in the forest.
            Something about running water mesmerizes my son and tames his sensory overload, a bonus to getting outdoors near creeks, waterfalls and ocean waves.
            The main falls on the Bill Williams Trail are nice, but the magical spot for me is a wooden bridge at the base of the creek, leading to a mysterious, woodsy stairway.
            This week’s Hike Notes lead along Bill Williams – Tucker Trail Waterfall Hike, one of my favorite destinations in the always wondrous Marin Watershed.
            Please feel free to share. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photos!
            The list of hikes is getting long! Please check the Quick View Hike List or scroll down the main Hikes page to see the current list of hike notes.
New this week:
Hike Notes 54: Bill Williams – Tucker Trail Waterfall Hike