Winter Light
Right before the pandemic, which feels like forever ago, Sean and I went for a December hike with our long-standing autism-support hiking buddy. Changing schedules reduced opportunities for hikes with him, but we found an open afternoon. Mid December meant we were close to the shortest day of the year, with the sun setting well before 5 PM. Our late afternoon start had us hitting the trail close to sunset. We chose old, familiar turf so we wouldn’t get lost as it got dark. The twilight highlighted driftwood sculptures as we made our way across Rodeo Beach in Marin. The last bit of sunlight gave an orange tinge to the sandy trail leading up the bluff. We saw another pair of hikers, red jackets popping against the dark green brush covering the hill. Red tips of ice plants mixed with their green bases, like a sea of Christmas decorations waving over the ground. We found our way to a vista point bench before the sun was truly down. On the horizon, one bright light appeared, then another. Crab season had started, and the lights of the crab boats created their own constellation on the water. By this point, we were out of sunlight, and we wandered off track through the ice plants as we made our way back down the hill to the beach. Like a string of holiday lights, the distant crab boats led us back toward our starting point. A coyote walked ahead of us nonchalantly, not caring about us hikers. Chilly ocean air, lights on the ocean, and dramatic blues and rosy oranges above the black horizon brought back memories of childhood winter walks in snowy Upstate New York. I’d start a subzero evening walk with just enough time to be back for dinner. Trudging through deep snowdrifts, the glow of the snow and the lights on the windows of our old house guided me home through the dark. There is a peace in twilight and cold that only comes in winter, a time when we contemplate family and loved ones, and reflect on the year behind us. Walking in the cold and dark also has a cleansing effect, eliminating cluttered thoughts, allowing us to simply feel the bite of the cold on our cheeks and instinctually find our footing in the dark. I wish everyone moments of quiet contemplation as we walk through the darkest days of the year, ready to move forward into brighter days. This week’s HikingAutism Hike Notes from the archives is Rodeo Lagoon Loop-Marin Headlands, a 1.5 mile loop hike that circles a lagoon, rises up for higher views, and also features a beach walk. This week’s Hike Notes from the Archives: (Original Hike Notes 110): Rodeo Lagoon Loop-Marin Headlands Click Insights/Hike Update News for inspiring reflections. Browse hikes on the main Hikes page or on the Hike Search by Area page. Check out selected articles and interviews under Media. Click World Walks to see or share favorite family-friendly walks! Stay in touch with Lisa Louis and HikingAutism via Contact. See products with inspiring designs that support the efforts of HikingAutism under Support/Shop. The Links page lists a loose collection of helpful information links. Check the Home page for the broader background story. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photo galleries at the bottom of each hike page! Feel free to share and follow on Facebook at HikingAutism, follow on Twitter at @HikingAutism and Instagram at lisalouis777
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Across Time and Space
Two years ago in an Insights post titled “Connections,” I wrote about my severely autistic son’s behavior toward his big brother, who was about to move away to London. Language-challenged Sean reverted to actions we hadn’t seen in years. Unable to verbalize his emotions, he showed frustration by trying to bite his brother’s arm. Processing the concept of a loved one moving away or coming home to visit for a short time is not easy for Sean. He does, however, have a powerful sense of intuition. Though he did not explicitly understand one morning two years ago that his brother would be on a plane by the time he got home from his support program, Sean engaged his brother in long eye contact and smiles before he left for his day. He knew somehow that it was time to show extra love to his brother. Now, for a second year in a row, big brother is coming home from England to stay through the holidays. Typically, instead of big hugs and smiles when Sean first sees his brother after a long absence, he almost ignores him. It’s as if he’s not sure to trust that his brother is actually real. Before a full day passes, though, Sean will be sitting close to his brother on the sofa. He’ll hold his hand on family hikes. Sean will revert to his old habit of yelling his brother’s name loudly and repeatedly for the duration of his visit, his way of insisting that his brother stay nearby. And then when the holidays are done we’ll start all over again as big brother flies back to his job in London. Being the sibling of a special needs sister or brother is not a typical life experience. It can be very challenging, but also presents the opportunity to be more patient, more understanding, and more adaptable. Cheers to all the brothers and sisters who do their best navigating their own lives while being supportive of special needs siblings and caregiver parents. They are members of a hidden club who don’t receive enough acknowledgement! This week’s HikingAutism Hike Notes from the archives is Stinson Beach, one of Marin County’s most iconic beaches, great for long walks whether in summer or winter. This week’s Hike Notes from the Archives: (Original Hike Notes 147): Stinson Beach Click Insights/Hike Update News for inspiring reflections. Browse hikes on the main Hikes page or on the Hike Search by Area page. Check out selected articles and interviews under Media. Click World Walks to see or share favorite family-friendly walks! Stay in touch with Lisa Louis and HikingAutism via Contact. See products with inspiring designs that support the efforts of HikingAutism under Support/Shop. The Links page lists a loose collection of helpful information links. Check the Home page for the broader background story. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photo galleries at the bottom of each hike page! Feel free to share and follow on Facebook at HikingAutism, follow on Twitter at @HikingAutism and Instagram at lisalouis777 Grateful
My mom used to tell people, “If someone gave Lisa a brown paper bag filled with dog poop, she’d still say thank you and mean it.” She was right. Rambling on a new trail on Thanksgiving Day, I was thinking about the simple things I’m grateful for. I am constantly aware of how lucky I am to live in the San Francisco Bay Area—a hodgepodge of urban centers intermeshed with stunning natural beauty in every direction. My house is small, but I am surrounded by treasures. I live one block from Golden Gate Park, and a few blocks from the Pacific Ocean. A short drive north over the Golden Gate Bridge leads to the iconic beauty of Marin. A brief drive south brings access to breathtaking beaches and deep forest trails. There is also plenty of inspiring nature across the bay to the east. I think I would appreciate local beauty any place I lived. I felt gratitude for my Upstate New York stomping grounds as a kid, and for the ancient magic of Kyoto, Japan where I lived in my twenties. Gratitude is something we can learn to apply to our current reality, rather than always reaching for something other. Not everyone has a car to get to the places I write about. I am grateful for my beat-up old Honda. Not everyone has the physical ability to move around with ease. I am grateful for a body that still moves me along a trail despite arthritis in my feet. Not everyone has loved ones nearby. I recently lost both parents, but am grateful for family and friends, for kind strangers I meet in everyday life, and for the connections I’ve made in the disabilities and nature fields through HikingAutism.com. May we all acknowledge the simple things that bring us joy, remembering to appreciate what we have rather than be preoccupied with what we don’t have. Thank you to gracious readers who continue to walk with me on HikingAutism.com! This week’s Hike Notes, Nora Trail-West Point Inn Connector, takes readers down the half-mile switchback connector trail that is part of a loop hike between Bootjack Campground and West Point Inn on Mt. Tam (covered in three separate posts). (Photo note: The photo for most Insights posts are from the hike covered in the Hike Notes they’re paired with. This photo, however, was taken at Windy Hill Open Space Preserve on Thanksgiving Day, which inspired thoughts for the post.) Check the Home page for the broader background story. Click Insights/Hike Update News for inspiring reflections. Browse hikes on the main Hikes page or on the Hike Search by Area page, and scroll to the bottom of each hike page to see full photo galleries. If you’d like to support HikingAutism, check out the Support/Shop page! Check out selected articles and interviews under Media. Click World Walks to see or share favorite family-friendly walks! Stay in touch with Lisa Louis and HikingAutism via Contact. The Links page lists a loose collection of helpful information links. Feel free to share and follow on Facebook at HikingAutism, follow on Twitter at @HikingAutism and Instagram at lisalouis777 New this week: Hike Notes 193: Nora Trail-West Point Inn Connector Walking Together: Behind the Design
Our older son, a graphic designer, helped me create designs that reflect the uplifting spirit of HikingAutism.com. It has been wonderful to see people enjoying items with the first design, the “Just Get to the Trailhead” silhouette of Sean chugging up a steep hill. Thanks to everyone for the support and encouragement! The second design introduced here is a silhouette image of two figures walking. I’m referring to this series of products as “Walking Together” because that’s the simple truth of what we do with our severely autistic son to make his and our lives better. We walk together. I see other families navigating autism or other physical or developmental challenges, and am always impressed when I see them trying a wide variety of activities. I know how much work it takes to find accessible and welcoming facilities and the support to try something new. Sean has worked hard to overcome extreme sensory overload and other obstacles that had him hiding under a blanket at home. With help, Sean got back out in the world for hiking. He has also had the courage to try rock climbing, kayaking, and overnight cabin stays with dedicated and patient guidance. Helpers brave enough to stick with our family and not let us give up have been key to us breaking free from near isolation. Still, the most comforting, uplifting activity we do with Sean is just getting outdoors and walking. Rain or shine, we’re out hiking every day that he’s not at his day program. Sean doesn’t talk much, but tolerates me commenting on the scenery to him as we walk side by side. He’s one of my favorite hiking buddies. To see the “Walking Together” design on various items, check out the HikingAutism Support/Shop page, or go directly to the HikingAutism Printify popup shop. The design reference photo of Sean and me walking together was taken on a hike under glowing autumn light in China Camp State Park in Marin County. The simple act of walking outdoors—alone or with a companion—is one of life’s priceless gifts. If getting outside to walk is not an option, open a window or door to look out at the sky and listen for birds. Nature is a no-cost prescription to alleviate stress! This week’s HikingAutism Hike Notes from the archives is China Camp Campsite to Chicken Coop Hill, a pretty walk with bay views amid rolling hills in San Rafael, CA. This week’s Hike Notes from the Archives: (Original Hike Notes 49): China Camp Campsite to Chicken Coop Hill Click Insights/Hike Update News for inspiring reflections. Browse hikes on the main Hikes page or on the Hike Search by Area page. Check out selected articles and interviews under Media. Click World Walks to see or share favorite family-friendly walks! Stay in touch with Lisa Louis and HikingAutism via Contact. See products with inspiring designs that support the efforts of HikingAutism under Support/Shop or directly at the HikingAutism Printify Popup Shop. The Links page lists a loose collection of helpful information links. Check the Home page for the broader background story. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photo galleries at the bottom of each hike page! Feel free to share and follow on Facebook at HikingAutism, follow on Twitter at @HikingAutism and Instagram at lisalouis777 Alternate Routes
I started sharing hikes and insights on the HikingAutism.com website about five years ago, but the project to get my severely autistic son out from under his sensory-protective shell and out into the world started more than ten years back. In those early years, I took snapshots on a little workhorse digital pocket camera so I’d have images to share with Sean when we got home. His ability to process the world through visual images is much more powerful than his facility with language. I didn’t always get great photos in the early years, and on a few hikes at iconic places, I simply didn’t capture enough photos to create a hike post from. One such early hike was to West Point Inn, a hallmark hiking destination on Mt. Tam. For years I’ve thought about going back to take better photos for a hike post. Taking exactly the same footsteps we took before isn’t always the best choice. After stewing about returning to West Point Inn for years, I pulled out a map and realized there are multiple options for getting there. My younger brother visited recently to process the loss of our mom and dad. It felt like the perfect opportunity to climb up to West Point Inn using an alternate route from the one Sean and I first climbed with our old hiking buddy years before. It was a joy making a return hike to West Point Inn, with great weather, great company, and refreshing new views on trails I hadn’t walked before. When returning to the same place via exactly the same route doesn’t feel quite right, try switching up your path to expand your views and discover new things to appreciate. Keep putting one foot forward! This week’s Hike Notes, Old Stage Road to West Point Inn, takes readers up the ascending half of a loop hike between Bootjack Campground and West Point Inn on Mt. Tam. Check the Home page for the broader background story. Click Insights/Hike Update News for inspiring reflections. Browse hikes on the main Hikes page or on the Hike Search by Area page, and scroll to the bottom of each hike page to see full photo galleries. If you’d like to support HikingAutism, check out the Support/Shop page! Check out selected articles and interviews under Media. Click World Walks to see or share favorite family-friendly walks! Stay in touch with Lisa Louis and HikingAutism via Contact. The Links page lists a loose collection of helpful information links. Feel free to share and follow on Facebook at HikingAutism, follow on Twitter at @HikingAutism and Instagram at lisalouis777 New this week: Hike Notes 192: Old Stage Road to West Point Inn When Things Go Right
Most of us notice immediately when things go wrong. It’s easy to remark on things that upset us. Yet we often forget to acknowledge when things go right. A year ago, I was worried about my mom’s health, but she rallied and forged ahead into the new year. Instead, my father passed away unexpectedly in May. Five months later, my mom followed. When a loved one dies, it’s hard not to feel that the world has gone awry. But we keep walking, embracing our best memories and looking for ways to make sense of loss. This week, one of my brothers is visiting from afar to do some memorial activities around our mom’s recent passing, and to emotionally regroup together. In our busy days since he arrived, with many things we wanted to accomplish, every activity has gone just right. How odd for life to twist a sad time into small positives that feel happy and fulfilling. Today, as a nature break, we had a specific trail plan for a hike on Mt. Tam. It started from a trailhead where my autistic son and I recently also had a well-set trail plan. On that day with my son, we fell astray from our planned route, leading to an unexpected bushwhacking climb straight up a steep part of Mt. Tam. Today, however, our drive, the weather, and the hike itself were just perfect. Even the hummingbirds posed for a photo op. In the midst of life’s challenges, we don’t often give a shout out when things go especially right. May we all remember to count our good days with as much emphasis as we count the hard days. Keep putting one foot forward! This week’s HikingAutism Hike Notes from the archives is Mountain Theater from Bootjack Campground, a hike where our trail plans went off track, but our off-trail adventure made reaching our destination all the more memorable. This week’s Hike Notes from the Archives: (Original Hike Notes 164): Mountain Theater from Bootjack Campground Click Insights/Hike Update News for inspiring reflections. Browse hikes on the main Hikes page or on the Hike Search by Area page. Check out selected articles and interviews under Media. Click World Walks to see or share favorite family-friendly walks! Stay in touch with Lisa Louis and HikingAutism via Contact. See products with inspiring designs that support the efforts of HikingAutism under Support/Shop. The Links page lists a loose collection of helpful information links. Check the Home page for the broader background story. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photo galleries at the bottom of each hike page! Feel free to share and follow on Facebook at HikingAutism, follow on Twitter at @HikingAutism and Instagram at lisalouis777 Smiles at the Trailhead
Hiking enthusiasts come to love walking in nature through unique journeys. Some of us want to share our love of a good trail so much that we create websites about it. I not only enjoy sharing hike information, but also love reading hiking and nature posts from others. Over the years of producing HikingAutism.com, I’ve made virtual friends with other hiking bloggers as we follow each other’s stories. It has been great fun to see what kind of trails people enjoy through their websites. The first friend to share a photo with one of our Just Get to the Trailhead T-shirts was Anusha Lee, who runs the website Taiwan Hikes, where she shares a variety of resources and information on how to make the most of hiking in Taiwan. It was such a joy to see Anusha share her photo when her T-shirt arrived in Taiwan! My “parallel coasts” blogger friend Marjorie Turner Hollman made me smile when she sent photos of herself in a Just Get to the Trailhead shirt while standing at a trailhead sign. That inspired me to do the same! Marjorie shares insightful information on finding easy walks for those with mobility issues and other challenges in the New England area through her posts on her website Marjorie Turner Hollman and in her Easy Walks book series. On a recent group hike for the Autism Society, I was happily surprised when some of our favorite hiking friends Susan and son Tyler showed up wearing their shirts! We’d worn ours to take photos that day, so had a fun surprise photo op. The Just Get to the Trailhead message is that when faced with extraordinary challenges, just making it to the starting point can be all we have the energy or resources for. That is still a worthy accomplishment. Remember to be kind to yourself during hard times. Give yourself credit for trying despite it all. Keep putting one foot forward! This week’s HikingAutism Hike Notes from the archives is Battery Townsley, a short but steep hike from Rodeo Beach to a historic military site with amazing ocean views, and the location of some of these shirt photos. This week’s Hike Notes from the Archives: (Original Hike Notes 48): Battery Townsley Check the Home page for the broader background story. Click Insights/Hike Update News for inspiring reflections. Browse hikes on the main Hikes page or on the Hike Search by Area page, and scroll to the bottom of each hike page to see full photo galleries. If you’d like to support HikingAutism, check out the Support/Shop page! Check out selected articles and interviews under Media. Click World Walks to see or share favorite family-friendly walks! Stay in touch with Lisa Louis and HikingAutism via Contact. The Links page lists a loose collection of helpful information links. Feel free to share and follow on Facebook at HikingAutism, follow on Twitter at @HikingAutism and Instagram at lisalouis777 Bright Patches
Death of a loved one. News filled with unimaginably horrible events. A devastating diagnosis for someone close. Overwhelming situations sometimes collide in a perfect storm of misfortune. The dark clouds are so heavy, it seems impossible that they will ever lift. But they do. At some point, a spot of light breaks through the darkness. We feel weary when yet another crisis strikes, but wisdom gained through the years assures us that the pendulum will swing back again. Reach out to ask for help when you need it, and offer it in turn when you’re able. Keep moving on your path. There will be bright spots again. This week’s Hike Notes, Madrone Trail to Salamander Flat-Wunderlich Park, leads readers on trails featuring contrasting light and shade through mixed forests of redwoods, oaks, madrone trees, and meadows with open views. Check the Home page for the broader background story. Click Insights/Hike Update News for inspiring reflections. Browse hikes on the main Hikes page or on the Hike Search by Area page, and scroll to the bottom of each hike page to see full photo galleries. If you’d like to support HikingAutism, check out the Support/Shop page! Check out selected articles and interviews under Media. Click World Walks to see or share favorite family-friendly walks! Stay in touch with Lisa Louis and HikingAutism via Contact. The Links page lists a loose collection of helpful information links. Feel free to share and follow on Facebook at HikingAutism, follow on Twitter at @HikingAutism and Instagram at lisalouis777 New this week: Hike Notes 191: Madrone Trail to Salamander Flat-Wunderlich Park Self-Care Right Down to Your Toes
Parents of special needs children are often reminded to live by the airplane safety advice: “Put your oxygen mask on first so you’ll be able to help your child put theirs on.” The time, energy and resources required to help a child with exceptional needs often means there is very little time to put oneself first for self-care in any form. Half an hour for a nap or to watch a sitcom as a brain break would be welcome, much less a date night for parents, a dinner out with friends, or a vacation somewhere. Even the simplest of these feel out of reach. I’ve learned to make outdoor time with my autistic son into “me time” that restores me mentally and physically. But taking care of ourselves isn’t one-dimensional. To enjoy time outdoors with my son, I not only need time and the wherewithal to go somewhere, I also have to be healthy. Walking is a great basic activity that mostly requires balance, flexibility and strength. I do well on those fronts, but there can be other obstacles. For me, it’s my feet. Arthritis is a genetic “gift” passed down through my family, and I’ve been dealing with joint inflammation since my early thirties. I’ve managed it for many years, but in recent times, joint pain has become entrenched in my feet, which is not conducive to gathering photos and trail information for a hiking website! To keep taking my son out on nature trails, I have to take care of myself. That means finding time to exercise, stretch, eat right, get enough rest, and though it costs a bit of money, get the right shoes. Even buying a new pair of hiking boots has become a challenge. I chose a new pair recommended by foot problem specialists, but I’ve been worried about causing new foot pain by wearing them. Right in my time of need, I stumbled onto a very helpful post on the Kuhl Hiking page: How to Break In Hiking Boots: The Ultimate Guide. I am going to follow the steps listed in that article in hopes of developing a pain-free relationship with my new hiking footwear. Long-gone are my youthful days of dancing in stiletto heels, toughing it out in a badass pair of cowboy boots a half size too small because it was the last pair on sale, and ice skating my way to blistered feet. Just maintaining basic foot functionality has become a hard-earned goal. I look forward to giving my new hiking boots a workout on a steep trail once I get them broken in. In the meantime, it’s comfortable sneakers with orthotic supports for these aching feet! May we all remember to stop, breathe, and take care of ourselves. Self-care needn’t be justified by saying it’s so you can take care of someone else, but if that’s what allows you to do something for yourself, that’s okay, too! Keep putting one foot forward! This week’s HikingAutism Hike Notes from the archives is Rhubarb to Miwok Trail Overlook, a Marin hike that has enough hills to put hiking boots through a bit of a workout, but pays off with beautiful views. This week’s Hike Notes from the Archives: (Original Hike Notes 52): Rhubarb to Miwok Trail Overlook Click Insights/Hike Update News for inspiring reflections. Browse hikes on the main Hikes page or on the Hike Search by Area page. Check out selected articles and interviews under Media. Click World Walks to see or share favorite family-friendly walks! Stay in touch with Lisa Louis and HikingAutism via Contact. See products with inspiring designs that support the efforts of HikingAutism under Support/Shop. The Links page lists a loose collection of helpful information links. Check the Home page for the broader background story. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photo galleries at the bottom of each hike page! Feel free to share and follow on Facebook at HikingAutism, follow on Twitter at @HikingAutism and Instagram at lisalouis777 Love Without Limits
Rare is the person who reaches adulthood without accumulating some emotional baggage. Psychological stress experienced by our grandparents carries through to our parents. The emotional burdens our parents lived through affect us as children. These evolve into personal stressors that we then pass on in part to our children. It’s easier to be objective about family emotional history as we gain wisdom with age. As the older generation of family members passes on, many of the complicated feelings dissipate, leaving simpler truths behind. This year I lost my beloved father in May. Five months later, my mother has passed away. At times she fit the image of a fiery redhead, angering easily, but was also generous of heart and loving. Her powerful sense of standing up for the underdog and stepping up to help those in need is a gift she passed down to children and grandchildren. The complicated relationship between most parents and children can become a simpler one between grandparents and grandchildren. My mom’s best self certainly shined through in that role. A severely autistic child like my son Sean can easily be isolated from the typical population because his behavior is unusual and unpredictable. Grandma didn’t care. She was as welcoming to him bouncing on her lap holding his forehead to hers while squeaking excitedly or endlessly playing with her long fingernails in fascination as she was to our older son sitting calmly next to her talking or reading books. She loved him without labeling him. He was her grandson, a young boy facing challenges that other kids might not. Her heart was unconditionally open to him, which allowed her to connect in a way many others couldn’t. Due to travel constraints for Sean and also for my mom, they didn’t see each other for many years, but Sean still looks at photos of her long-past visits and yells, “Grandma!” When a person passes on, we can let the baggage we carried in our relationship float away with the clouds. It is an opportunity to love without labels and without limits the way my mom showed love to Sean. May we all find the wherewithal to let people know we love them before they float off into the sunset and find peace as we process their passing. This week’s HikingAutism Hike Notes from the archives is South Rodeo Beach Trail, a short walk that leads to a small patch of pretty beach in the Marin Headlands. This week’s Hike Notes from the Archives: (Original Hike Notes 145): South Rodeo Beach Trail Click Insights/Hike Update News for inspiring reflections. Browse hikes on the main Hikes page or on the Hike Search by Area page. Check out selected articles and interviews under Media. Click World Walks to see or share favorite family-friendly walks! Stay in touch with Lisa Louis and HikingAutism via Contact. See products with inspiring designs that support the efforts of HikingAutism under Support/Shop. The Links page lists a loose collection of helpful information links. Check the Home page for the broader background story. If you’re not able to take one of these Northern California hikes, hopefully you can enjoy the photo galleries at the bottom of each hike page! Feel free to share and follow on Facebook at HikingAutism, follow on Twitter at @HikingAutism and Instagram at lisalouis777 |
Lisa LouisSharing insights and hiking highlights (Hikes, Hike Search by Area) from the special needs caregiver front in San Francisco. Archives
December 2023
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